Several years ago it was time to have part 1 of “The Talk” with my daughter. Since then she and I have regrouped to talk a little more about sex and sexuality, as well as God’s gift of sexuality and intention for sex, love and marriage and Hollywood’s version. It’s an open conversation that we started in 5th grade, before the school health presentation, because I have control issues and wanted her to hear the information from me first.
This year was Peter’s turn to start the conversation with Corban. I was hoping the conversation would take place first thing this year, but I was reminded that before we began to talk honestly and openly about sex we would have to undo some of our harmless lies.
Kathy: Honey, when are you going to have “The Talk” with Corban?
Peter: Well, I was thinking we should start out with the Tooth Fairy.
Kathy: Oh. Shoot.
…at least a month later…
Kathy: Honey, how about “The Talk”?
Peter: Well, what about Santa?
Kathy: You couldn’t just take care of Santa when you took care of the Tooth Fairy?
Peter: Honey, that’s a lot in one talk. Too traumatic.
…another month or so…
Kathy: Well, how did it go?
Peter: Well, Corban’s response was, “Dad, why do we have to talk about grown-up stuff?”
The “grown-up stuff” he hears today at school will be no surprise. Corban mentioned last night that today’s half-day schedule involved a talk on puberty – imagine a 10-year-old boy speaking with a touch of disdain and rolling his eyes. Honestly, there is tiny, tiny part of my Mommy heart that is relieved that Corban isn’t in a rush to grow up. I saw (and continue to see) more of that in Bethany and her female friends, especially as it relates to their bodies – how they dress and look.
But it’s time. It’s time to start talking openly and honestly as best as we can, as appropriately as we can. Peter and Corban, just like Bethany and I did years ago, have begun what we hope and pray will be a lifelong conversation that starts with “grown-up stuff” and never ends.