Thanks For Asking. I’m OK.

For those of you who told me to accept the apology, I can’t infer an apology just like people don’t become Christians through osmosis. And to my dear married readers, try saying “I’m sorry if you were hurt but…” and see how that goes.

For those of you who told me to extend grace because Warren’s son committed suicide several months ago, tragedy should be the reason one seeks wise counsel, not the excuse for unwise social media decisions. I live with depression and anxiety. I get it. I really do. But that doesn’t mean I can say what I want at home or publicly and not deal with any consequences.

For those of you who told me I was too sensitive, making this personal, didn’t get the joke, need to learn to laugh at myself, tell that to someone you actually know and love the next time you hurt them. See how that works for you.

For those of you who told me I was being unchristian, ungracious, unforgiving, I am not so sure your comments to me and fellow bloggers reflected your values.

For those of you who pulled out Matthew 18:15-17, read that passage again and then read this. It’s not the application you thought it was because it’s not always about you.

For those of you who told me I was ruining the name of a great leader all I can say is…really? That’s not what this is about. At all.

For those of you who said it wasn’t fair to target such a prominent pastor, why not? Does prominence and power mean a free pass? Does being a pastor mean you get a free pass? Does the person you hope will gently correct you not need gentle correction?

For those of you who told me to be a Christian before an Asian American, please consider how you are putting your White evangelical privilege into textbook use.

No, it’s not the gracious, sweet, calm voice of reason you thought you might hear/read. It’s the gracious, sweet, calm voice of reason from a different vantage point, a different place of power and experience and life.  Facebook isn’t a private conversation. The interwebs are not private offices. Television interviews and magazine articles are not the face of someone hiding from public opinion.

And while I am at it. My family and I are OK. Thanks for asking.


  1. John Robin HayesJ October 8, 2013

    You do not know me. I am a Christian, with deep deep very deep roots in China. Praise the Lord You are correct. Don’t stop even though we are imprisoned for Christ, I am glad you are not ashamed of the Gospel. Remember Job’s friends were dweebs. 🙂

    signed. John, a Christian Brother who tries to obey and worship Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

    • Kathy Khang October 10, 2013

      Thanks for reading, John, and for giving me a hearty laugh over Job’s friends. Those were an interesting group of friends, were they not? Grace and peace to you!

  2. drivkin7428 October 8, 2013

    The very future of the Christian movement is anchored in the key teaching of Jesus…namely the Kingdom of God is in the midst of you. If the Kingdom of God is the restoration of all things in Christ, then there is no place for racism, sexism, or any other -ism for that matter. Warren was wrong. Period. We as Christians should be about revealing those glimpses of the Kingdom, being both careful and forgiving until Jesus comes again.

  3. Marianne Wong October 8, 2013

    You have done nothing wrong! What you wrote is absolutely right! You have me and my man- Steven full support!! Sending you a cyber ((((hug with blessings))) ^^.
    Marianne, writing from Calgary

    • Kathy Khang October 10, 2013

      Marianne & Steven, thank you for the cyber hug. Truly grateful for your kindness.

  4. Hyphenata October 9, 2013

    Kathy, I’ve been carefully following your thoughts here as well as your engagement with others on FB…ie. Ken Fong’s threads. Thank you articulating what I and so many others have been experiencing. I especially appreciate your vulnerability.

    • Kathy Khang October 10, 2013

      Thanks, Hyphenata, for reading along on several platforms. It’s good to be reminded of why I bother to care or write. Grace and peace to you!

  5. Marion October 28, 2013

    I can’t speak for anyone else, just myself and sometimes I don’t do that very well. I’m learning there are so many opinions out there and they’re all worth about what you pay for them – mine included. You may remember I posted earlier in the midst of the melee. I’m grateful for your comments and they helped open my eyes. I’m sensitive to things that hurt me but not always sensitive to things that hurt others. You helped me see how this hurt others. Whatever people think please know that you opened this person’s eyes and I like to think that, maybe, your speaking out, for me at least, was helpful.

    • Kathy Khang October 28, 2013

      For what it is worth, Marion, you do a heck of a job speaking for yourself here. Thank you for reminding me that in the midst of the melee eyes were opened. Grace and peace.


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